Dark Night of the Soul

I don't know much about Saint John of the Cross, except that he was a Spanish mystic, poet and priest who lived about 500 years ago and came up with the phrase, "The Dark Night of the Soul". He saw The Dark Night of the Soul as an inevitable part of the spiritual journey.

I think of the last few days as a Dark Night of the Soul experience, and although it was very unpleasant and I don't look forward to experiencing it again, there was something about it that seems useful. I took a look at my fear of death, decay and helplessness. I was afraid. It's useful, now that it's past, to see how strong that fear can be. It is also useful, now that it is past, to see the way out of that fear.

I know part of this is biochemical, and sometimes a person will have an elaborate philosophical, psychological, spiritual or poetic explanation for something that comes down to chemicals in the brain, but bear with me.

Things turned around when I shifted from thinking about the future to living in the present.

Thoughts on cheering up

Thanks everyone for your kind words during my brief journey into the dark night of the soul.

I am now back to a more normal state of cheerful amazement, resting in the present moment, the Eternal Now, the Big Mystery. It is once again obvious that Life is Good.

I am the Universe, speaking to you through the body mind of Tom Carr, whispering "Enjoy your life".

Back to Work

I retired when I was 54. I was a computer programmer, software developer. I am now 58.

In October when the stock market was crashing I got a call from a guy named Steve who runs the information systems department at a local mid size company. He wanted to know if I would be interested in doing some part time work. Someone I had worked with in the past was now working for him and had recommended me.

A few months earlier I would have turned him down. The life of total leisure was too much fun. I would not even have talked to him, but the stock market crash was giving me second thoughts about the wisdom of early retirement. I met with Steve and liked him. I was surprised at how excited I got as he talked about the system and the project. A side of my personality woke up that is like a little kid who sees working with computer systems as playing with fancy toys.

He made me an offer and I accepted. I would be working 20 hours a week at home. He gave me a new state of the art computer with all the best development software. I would make more than enough to live on from that part time work and could even add a little to my retirement investments. It is an ongoing project. If it works out I will be doing it for several years.

This started out as my way of sleeping better at night in the current economic conditions, but so far it has also been great fun.

I was lucky to get the offer. At my age, and having been out of the market for 4 years, it is unusual to get calls offering well paid part time programming work. He actually prefers hiring older workers because we are more stable. Life is a mixture of good luck and bad luck. This was my good luck.

Thoughts on Religion and Spiritual Life

I don't claim any profound knowledge. I can just tell you some of my theories. They could all be wrong but are my best understanding at this point in my life. Here goes:

I think the potential for spiritual experience is something that is within everyone. It is very difficult to describe. Maybe impossible to describe. In attempting to put it into words people have called it the Grace of God, Union with God, Enlightenment, Spiritual Awakening and lots of other things. It can change your life, fill you with awe and wonder and love and beauty. It is the most important thing. It is Beautiful Beyond Words. Any attempt to put it into words falls short.

This thing is within human nature. People all over the world with all kinds of different beliefs have this experience. It often comes with a feeling of absolute certainty. When they come down a from the Mountain Top people try to describe the indescribable, try to understand that which is beyond understanding. They will describe the experience based on their culture and beliefs. If they are Christian they will be absolutely certain the experience proves the truth of their Christian faith. If Moslem they will be absolutely certain the experience proves the truth of their Moslem faith. If Buddhist or Hindu or Jewish absolutely certain it proves the truth of that faith.

I think the spiritual experience doesn't prove anything about any faith. It just is.

I think the various religious beliefs are actually a problem that create confusion. They create separation between people of different faiths. They are based on old superstitions and really don't have much to do with the Spiritual Experience, the Big Truth beyond language.

I think that by letting go of the various religious beliefs and old superstitions we can actually lead a deep spiritual life.

Those are my thoughts.

Government regulation

I like the idea of the government controlling and regulating some things. I have just been reading about problems with imports from China in industries that are not regulated. Pet food with melamine killed lots of dogs and cats, toothpaste had poison in it, Chinese cough medicine killed 300 people in Panama, and so on. In addition to the suffering and death resulting from this lack of regulation, these things will hurt the Chinese economy because people will be less likely to buy food, medicine or anything dangerous from China.

Regulation is an important part of a modern functioning economy. The Chinese economy is being damaged by lack of regulation. I think it is valid to complain about a particular regulation that you think is wrong, but I don't think it makes much sense to criticize the concept of government regulation in general.

Global Population

I am thinking of changing my allocation to international stocks, and this is why.

I am reading a book, "Futurecast" by Robert Shapiro, that talks about the changes we can expect between now and 2020. He goes into great detail about huge coming problems in Europe and Japan caused by declining birth rates. These countries have promised much more to retires than the USA. Our problems with social security seem trivial in comparison. We have a higher birth rate and more immigration. We will have some problems when a smaller group of workers has to pay social security for a large group of baby boomers but we will manage.

Japan has a declining population and almost no immigration. France, Germany and Italy have declining populations and some immigration, but the immigrants are not as productive as the Mexicans coming to the USA, and the problems with Moslem immigrants may lead to a backlash against immigration.

These countries are going to have a huge problem which will severely impact their economies and may lead to destabilizing social unrest and possibly a type of ugly class warfare between seniors expecting big benefits and young workers resentful of a declining standard of living because of the taxes needed to pay the seniors.

On the other hand, I have been predicting the future since I first started reading Science Fiction at about age 12. I have almost always been wrong. A few years ago I was throwing out a bunch of old Time and Newsweek magazines that were 5-10 years old. I read all the predictions by the pundits in those magazines. They were all wrong. It is fun to try to guess the future, but there are so many variables that it is usually impossible.

What do you think? Leave a comment and tell me.

Political discourse

"Discussions should be conducted without fondness for dispute or desire for victory." - Ben Franklin

Anger is a great motivator and both political parties are using anger to motivate their base. This has lead to a situation where both liberals and conservatives are furious and think the other side is composed of idiots and scoundrels. This is not healthy. There is a mixture of wisdom and folly coming from both sides. Most of the politicians really are corrupt scoundrels, but most of the voters on either side are just decent people doing their best to understand a complicated world. I am trying to spend more time listening and understanding, and less time arguing, condemning and trying to persuade others to my point of view.

I'll be happy to listen to any political point of view as long as it is presented in a friendly intelligent manner. I am tired of listening to angry rants. I would rather talk to people who are curious and realize there is a lot they don't know.

In most conversations a person can take the one of two roles. We can see ourselves as trying to win a contest, or we can see ourselves as trying to learn something new. It is hard to do both. I prefer the role of the learner. I prefer curiosity to competition.

Do not worry about running out of oil

If there is less oil we will use less. We will have smaller cars, drive less, fly less, keep our air conditioners running less. We will eat more food that is grown near by rather than using huge amounts of oil to transport food all over the world. Maybe we will even grow more of our food. I have a friend now who claims he grows half of what he eats in a vegetable garden about 25 feet square. He seems to get a lot of pleasure from doing this.

Life will go on. People might even be happier. They will hang out in their own neighborhoods and make friends with their neighbors rather than driving all over the place looking for fulfillment.

In the short run we will use less energy. Don't worry about it. We don't need to live like this, burning all this oil to be happy.

In the long term we will develop solar, wind, safe nuclear and other forms of energy. We will learn to do things with greater energy efficiency and have more energy than ever.

Don't worry. Be happy.

Test links

This tests links:

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Katherines web site

Katherine is going into private practice. Here is a web site I built for her:

http://katherinedurant.com/

The second domain goes to the same site

http://katherinedurantesq.com/

And you get to the same place using WWW

http://www.katherinedurant.com/

http://www.katherinedurantesq.com/